If you came in search of an in-depth guide, unfortunately you’re in the wrong place, but feel free to stay for a good-humoured debate.
Chris | Black Eagles
I'm just as unfamiliar with Fire Emblem as I am with Pokémon, so I figured the best way to choose a house is by process of elimination. I started by eliminating the Blue Lions and Golden Deer, because they’re terrible houses for garbage people, which leaves me with the Black Eagles. Proud, majestic and one of nature's most elegant creatures, I will make a fine addition to the noble house.
Lions are adorable and probably make great pets for people who love cats but wish they were bigger. They aren't fighters, though - I hate to break it to you, but The Lion King is a work of fiction. Do you know anyone who’s been attacked by a lion? No, you don’t. The Cyan Cats manage a respectable second place.
At the bottom of the food chain, much like in real life, are the Yellow Venison. These second-rate antelope are prey. They get eaten by lions and, as we all know, lions are soft, timid animals. My colleagues will try to win you over with facts and logic but this is about the law of the jungle; lions eat deer and eagles definitely eat lions.
Liam | Golden Deer
These are dark times indeed when I find myself allying with Sobble-loving Sam and turning on a proud Team Grookey member in Chris, but I cannot let old loyalties influence my decision - it just wouldn’t be right. As has been noted, we take these choices very seriously here at PTC towers!
It’s with a heavy heart, then, that I say boo to the emo wizards that are the Black Eagles, instead affixing my colours to the Golden Deer. The name might sound like an old lady’s description of a darling grandchild, but their democratic leanings, archery-based combat and likeable leader won out over the other houses’ given ‘attributes’. Not that the Black Eagles have many of those. Again, I’m sorry Chris.
My second choice was the Blue Lions. They have the best name, and their in-your-face tactics when it comes to combat certainly appeal (they’d probably be a good fit for my combat-focused dream team), but their devout leanings and snobbish cast cooled my interest in them.
If we’re being honest, all of the houses seem to have their fair share of knobs, but at least they’ve all got feet this time, which is an upgrade on the last Fire Emblem game I played.
James | Black Eagles
Magic is cool, and if that isn't a good enough reason from the outset then I might have an uphill struggle on my hands.
Since young Harry Potter exploded onto the scene 20 years ago, the hype hasn't fully died down, and, if anything, magic is more mainstream now than it ever was in the past. Image isn't everything of course, and so what about the practical benefits? One word - versatility. Your elemental attacks will work at various ranges, giving you the flexibility to build a character suited to your play style rather than being pushed into a corner.
We're also told the Eagles "challenge the status quo" (according to a very handy primer from Game Informer) and who doesn't enjoy a bit of rebellion? Plus, you can take care of yourself with support spells and healing, rather than relying on flaky teammates.
The Eagles' inspirational leader Edelgard, the Adrestrian Empire’s future emperor, values those who excel, and as a result has attracted a colourful range of students, including the sarcastic Hubert, the carefree Lindheart and the ambitious Ferdinand. Who wouldn't want to hang out with such a colourful array of characters?
What's your Fire Emblem house of choice? Any love for the Blue Lions, or have Team PTC managed to sway you to their ways of thinking? Let us know with a comment below.